Tuesday, February 27, 2007

~ perspective, hope, love, n wht not ~

how you view something, pov of someone, how you place urself. lately i've lost the perspective in my life. when someone leaves you to be far, the perspective changed. to me its been changing for as long as i've known. how does perspective affect yours? when there is uncertainity of the path thats laid before you becomes blurry or unstable, when u thought everythin has been set out, somethin along the way changes the course or draws ur attention away from where you want to be. how do use ur perspective to be able to see the bigger picture.

lately i've not been myself, too much emptiness. why is that when i get too close to someone they are taken away. its just happenin all over. when i started my long distance, i knew it was difficult, but never imagined if wud be so hard. i mean everything around us has changed. guess im taking my time to take everythin into me. but wht if i end being too late to make anythin for u. would be alright if i don get the chance again to be with you. everything has become so uncertain. i've never waited for anyone as much i've waited for u. i've never given so much of myself for anyone else in my life. when my whole perspective of love, relationship, companionship, life changed everythin in line with you. now your taken away from me. my mind keeps saying that everything is going to be alright.

i've never hoped for anythin in my life. while grew, i made myself a hard head, any emotion that could make me weak out not in me. but u showed me there is nothin wrong in having some for a better day. there is only hope that you'd be with me. with everythin else going wrong around me, only thing keeping me on track is you. sometimes lonliness creeps too much. i just get petrified when i think whats going to happen to tomorrow. i know your parents are never goin accept whats between, yet i hold your arm. everyone tells me im too young to be in a serious relationship. well i've run the field for sometime now, i might be kid by age, but i've got my fair share of time to getting to play, find what you want for the rest of ur n not for the night.

i started to write on somethin, i've ended up with somethin else. my perspective has changed to see you wud be with me for a very long long time. to be there for u when u need me, in the right way. to hold you in my arms, n im too proud to take u out(i hope u know tht). im not the bad ass guy u knew when we were friends. u know i've changed myself for u. there is so much which i was yesterday which im not today. inside me there is the animal and the human. somehow u managed to make the human out of the animal. but sometimes i've scarred you. sorry wud help at al, just so u know i didnt mean to make it that way.

i guess the perspective changes n differs when both of us are on different sides of life n society. what am i goin to change alone? sometime soon maybe i shud understand that n accept that. but when ur young n in love i dont know give up. not again, not with you. ur just happen to be too much in me, aint goin to let go that easily.

Friday, February 16, 2007

~ missing you ~

wish you were here with me right now
let me put my arms you and hold u close to me
not too tight, not away from me
jus the wy u always come into ma arms when u hug to leave me
ur last fragrance still fresh in my mind
your kiss before you turned n walked away from me
tell me how am i make up the weeks your not going to be here with me
its just been couple of days n still i want u to come back to me right now
thinkin about being away for just weeks drives me crazy
it evens hurts n drives me insane thinkin about you going to be away for far longer than that
my mind just goes to trance, thinking wht u would be doing right this moment
when im sitting here thinkin about you, would u be thinkin about me
would be wishin i was there with you, wishin i was holding your hands
in a land where we are couples n strangers to others
i wish i could steal u away from where i'm
a place only the two of us, look into each others
with no fear of being taken away from each other
where the thought of you'll be always mine
where i know only u and be with you

wake up every mornin next to you, you in ma arms still sleeping
wish i wud wake up before you every mornin, to watch you sleep
roll in bed with your eyes half open and hair fall on me
with my hands holding and my eyes just gaze into you
kiss you mornin, hug you tight and let you curl and fall into sleep again
run ma fingers thru ur hair and curl em
bite ur ear lobes n kiss u on ur lips
n u gettin on me n not letting me sleep
wish you with me, here with me now
so u could wat im typing, so you wud be first who reads this
you wud be the one knowin that i love you too much
i just dont know how to tell it to you
maybe im just searchin to say wht to say to you
but i've realised i wished i told you i love you more often
everytime ur hand wud search for mine, everytime you smile just when u look at me

i just cant find a reason wht made u fall in love with me
after u know so much about me, after all the times i've let u down
wonder why took the chance with me
don ever think i wud leave for another
i just hurts too much everytime u say that
i dont know if u mean it or not, but it aint funny
wishin i had someone in life
was getting so comfy in my solitude
not anymore, wishin u wre with me every
my mind maybe roamin around wen im with you
but when i take back to you, i just cant simply find a reason how come those eyes fell for me
would u be mine forever, would u be there when im down, wud u let me be there when ur down
wud u let me hold n let u cry when u just want to

years ahead seems all blur n clear
sandy beaches, no work, no phones, no fear of u being taken away from me
just u n me, i jus wanna melt in ur arms and let u hold me really tight n let go of me ever
walk on the beach, watchin the sunset n dippin our feet in sea
cook for each other, be always in each others arms
house only for the two of us, a place to share between us
a house to be burned wen ur mad at me, a house to be curled in cozy cold weather
wish u wud always fall asleep in ma arms n let me carry you to bed
watch you curl up n sleep in ma arms every night

is this too much to wish for, is this of a young loves' wish or simply how much i miss you,
i've told you wht i want with you from now, with u by my side always
to know no matter how the world turns against me, u wud be there for me
no matter wht comes between us, no matter how many arguments, no matter how many long night conversation, no matter how many early mornin wake up calls, i will be there
always know to let ur hand so i wud grab out for it

miss you too much baby, come back in to ma arms quick
till my eyes set on you, memory of being with you fresh in me..

wrote this while you wre away from me.. hope you'd get to read this know and i do miss you maybe not n how u want me to.. but i sure do...